Looking for a Good Bargain?  Check Out Uncle John’s “Real” Classified Ads  : )

 1 Amana washer $100. Owned by clean bachelor who seldom washed. // Snow blower for sale...only used on snowy days. // 2 wire mesh butchering gloves, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, pair: $15. // '83 Toyota hunchback -- $2000. // Free puppies: 1/2 cocker spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog. // Soft & genital bath tissues or facial tissue 89 cents. // Full sized mattress. 20 yr warranty. like new. slight urine smell. // Free 1 can of pork & beans with purchase of 3 br 2 bth home. // Nordic Track $300 hardly used, call Chubbie. // Bill's septic cleaning "we haul American made products". // Found: dirty white dog...looks like a rat...been out awhile...better be reward. // Hummels largest selection ever, "if it's in stock, we have it!" // Get a little john: the traveling urinal holds 2 1/2 bottles of beer. // Nice parachute never opened used once slightly stained. // Free: farm kittens. ready to eat. // FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.